I'm really not sure if anyone actually reads this... so that's why I've stopped writing. But I guess part of writing this is to keep track of my own life, the ups and downs, and hopefully I share something that someone somewhere will find interesting, interesting enough to help them through whatever they're going through, or just for some personal enjoyment, that works for me too.
I don't really know where to start, my last post was apparently December 31st, 2012... which I thought was kinda funny, I haven't posted for 7 months. Let's just say, not a whole lot happened new years day which caused me to not post, in fact, I don't even remember what happened at all, but that's besides the point.
What actually prompted me to post is the fact that I started going to Church again, more specifically, I started going to Tenth 3rd Service. Some background info... my brother use to work at this Church, he worked at a different site so I never saw him, but when I first moved to Vancouver I'd go to Tenth, mainly because I didn't know any other churches around the area. Then I started to get lazy, school started, met a friend that went to a Chinese church... more background info... I grew up in a Chinese Church, I didn't really have a good experience with it, I went every Sunday because my family went, and later on I went every Sunday because well.. it was a routine, and there was no way my mom would ever let me skip Church, so I kept going, but the experience I had at Church was not the greatest. Granted I had friends there but that was pretty much the highlight of Church, being able to socialize with my Church friends... which I thought was kinda pointless because we can just do that outside of Church.
Anyway, since I hadn't been to a Chinese Church in such a long time, and I actually knew someone that went, I thought I'd go with them to give it a try... I went, for a few weeks, and it got kinda mundane, I wasn't getting anything out of it, and even though I had only been going for 3 weeks, I felt like I was already back in a routine that I had for years when I grew up in a Chinese Church back in Calgary.
So I stopped going, and then a few weeks later I felt like I needed to try something else, so I went to a mega church, it felt great, the experience was good, but I still didn't really feel like I belonged, I really don't know why, it just felt weird, it was too big, it felt like I was there but not really there, I felt like everyone around me were perfect, and I'm not worthy enough to be there, so I stopped going back.
Things then got pretty busy, I started to work and my Sundays consisted of sleeping in (by 1 hour compared to other days), waking up, going to work and sometimes doing something after work or just going home to relax... until one Sunday I don't know why I suddenly decided to try going to Tenth 3rd Service. I was really nervous, I was scared, I hadn't been to Church in probably over 6 months, spiritually I was feeling quite down, emotionally I was not doing well either, I felt broken. For the first time ever when I walked in and the worship team started playing I felt like I was surrounded by a presence I cannot describe with words, I didn't feel like the people around me were perfect, I felt like they were just like me, and in the beginning it was REALLY weird, I was almost like.. "Woah, why are they here.. is this even real?" Then I started to feel God speak to me, this is what Church is suppose to be like, we're suppose to go Worship God as we are, it doesn't matter Who we are, How we're dressed, and What's been happening, we're all there, together to Worship God and that's all that mattered. I soon began to feel something I had not felt in years, I felt God's presence in the room, in a room full of people that I normally would walk away from if I saw them in the street, people I would be quick to judge, and people I would never associate myself with because of how "scruffy" they looked, I felt that God was trying to tell me something, that He welcomes everyone, every single person that wants to be there to Worship Him.
I don't really know what I'm trying to say with this post... Am I magically healed and all perfect now? No, definitely not, I still have my emotional and spiritual struggles, but at least I now have a place where I can feel safe, and attempt to grow in a stronger spiritual relationship. I hope if someone out there really does read this, it somehow helps you or maybe even just gives you something to think about.
Anyway, that's my story about Church, I hope to keep updating this blog again on a regular basis.
Monday, July 22, 2013
Monday, December 31, 2012
Do all things really happen for a reason...
Or do we just make up excuses for ourselves to make us feel better? It's an interesting question which I'm pretty sure there's no right or wrong answer to... but it's kind of cool to think about... When one thing happens and then something as a result happens because of it, is it a coincidence, a chain of events, or is that just an excuse we give ourselves to justify what we did earlier and make us feel less stupid or less regretful of what we did?
STORY TIME...
This past week and a half I have been back in my home, well, home in Canada, Calgary. Bracing freezing -20 temperatures and leaving my semi-new life behind in beautiful British Columbia to be back here spending the Christmas with my friends and most importantly my parents. Except things didn't really go all that well... The first two days I got back I was still a bit caught up with the cold I managed to get right before leaving Vancouver, but that's okay, I didn't actually have much planned those two days other than relax, rest so I could get better and embark on some adventures with my friends. Unfortunately my days "resting" with the exception of one night didn't really work out as well as I had planned, I went out for drinks/food with some school friends, then stayed up quite late at another friend's house watching them play Majong then proceeded to go home and do some non-productive work (video games, guitar, and talking on the phone) till pretty late... needless to say the rest I was hoping to get didn't exactly happen. The next day I met up with a friend and went to the Oval and did some ice skating... never thought I'd actually do this again willingly, but it's one of those things where I guess I didn't realize how much I enjoyed it till I got the hang of doing it, I had tons of fun and we spent over 3 hours non-stop skating on the biggest rink I've ever been on, in the meantime I had some deep conversations with my friend which was quite invigorating to the mind. Later on that night I had plans to meet up with other friends for dinner, as I was about to leave the house my mom calls me and says.. "wait, don't leave yet".. thinking it was something like.. "can you pickup milk" or something trivial... I waited in the kitchen profusely while constantly checking my phone at the time... then the next thing I hear is.. "uh.. your dad's sick, gotta go to rocky view" (rocky view is a hospital near my house). I'm not really sure how I felt at this point, not gonna lie I was upset because I was already late, but at the same time I was a little worried, so for the next bit my life goal suddenly shifted to get my dad to the hospital as quickly as possible.
the drive to the hospital
While my dad was in the back seat throwing up, I was attempting to speed down the icy roadways of Calgary trying to remember exactly how to get to the hospital the fastest. I don't deal well with someone puking around me, I get sick easily, if I see someone throw up, I will throw up even if I was perfectly healthy... so I had to concentrate my hardest on just driving and tried to ignore everything that was going on behind me. Once we finally got to the hospital I parked asian style and ran in to get a wheel chair, proceeded to help my dad on the wheel chair and pushed him into the ER queue. I left to go meet my friends to which I was an hour late and right before leaving I told my mom to call me as soon as anything happens. Initially at dinner I wasn't sure how I felt, but then I started talking with my friends (about random stuff) and I sorta let what just happened sink to the back of my mind, we ended up staying past till the restaurant closed and was pretty much forced to leave, that was fun, and filling, we had korean bbq and it was really good, minus the smell it left on my jacket.
still waiting for that phone call
It had now been 3 hours since I dropped my mom and dad off at the hospital and I still hadn't heard back, so I attempted to call my mom and it just went straight to voicemail.. I'm like.. ok, well why don't I just go home and wait, in the meantime I'll package up those tires I picked up earlier in the morning to drop them off at Greyhound to ship to Vancouver for my car. So I went home and started doing that, after an hour and a half later I was finally finished, I went back to my room and proceeded to play guitar for an indefinite period of time... I check my phone and it's now 4am... I kept my phone on loud as I proceeded to fall asleep phone in my hand. *RING RING*, 7ish am and I am awoken by a call from my mom, "wow you're awake, you answered so quick, sorry there was no reception here, can you come pick me up, I have an appointment". So I quickly got up and drove again to the hospital to pickup my mom. Once I brought her home I went straight back to bed, except I couldn't sleep well, I was starting to feel... sick. My head was starting to feel quite heavy and my body ached, I chalked it up to wrestling with four 40lb winter tires the night before and didn't think much about it. I woke up shortly after and forced myself out of bed as I needed to bring those packaged tires to Greyhound that day, as I didn't have any time the rest of the days I was here since I was planning on going skiing and hiking the next 2 days. After bringing the tires to greyhound I got home and felt like I was going to die, I was so exhausted and my head must've been on fire at this point I just crashed on my bed, till around 8pm or so when my mom woke me up and said.. "Oh you're here... aren't you suppose to be at your friend's house". Then I realized.. oh crap, yeah... I guess not anymore. Then as I attempted to get up I realized I was not just tired, but I had a fever, not a super high one mind you, but the highest one I can recall having for a number of years, all I could think about was my skip trip tomorrow, what am I going to do. At this point I hadn't taken anything except for vitamin C tablets as I had been the entire time since I was back. My mom made me take a tylenol and I felt a bit better shortly after that, I then proceeded to get extremely pissed off and wrote the blog post you see before this one titled "FTS."
FTS.
I was pretty mad, not really sure at who, it was more at myself for being stupid, at the end of the day I got myself into this situation by not taking care of my health, but at the same time, if my dad didn't get sick I would've been okay, I think... but was I the one who got my dad sick in the first place? Who knows, anyway I stopped thinking about it because ultimately I can't really blame anyone but myself. So I punched my table a few times and just gave up and went back to sleep. The next day I wake up feeling just as bad, and funny thing is the first thing I think of again is the trip to Kananaskis with my friends the next day, I was thinking to myself if I have to cancel this I am going to kill someone. So I spent most of that day trying to force myself back to bed, without much luck I kept waking up feeling like crap and my fever hadn't gone down at all since the first day, my mom kept wanting me to go see a doctor but I hate them so I declined. Finally it was so late I had to decide whether tomorrow was still on or not as we had to pickup rental gear that night if we were still going to go, as much as I wanted to I sadly sent the message that I had to cancel.
-----
So... these are the things I told myself as a result of this past week:
1) Life is unexpected - No matter what you plan for, sh*t happens, and most of the time there's not much you can do about that, you just have to learn to cope and deal with it as it happens..
2) Make the best of what you have - Yeah, none of my plans went well, i got sick, I pretty much didn't leave my house the past few days, but I did manage to play a lot of guitar, and I have now realized playing guitar is another one of those hidden interests which I didn't really realize I had till now. I still suck, but I've never had more fun playing an instrument that causes pain in my fingers.
3) Don't blame others - Sure you could spend all day playing the blame game, but what's the point. Just move on and deal with it.
----
Whether or not those are excuses I gave myself as a result of what happened, or the seemingly poor choices I made that may or may not have resulted in what occurred. I guess we'll never know, but sometimes making a poor choice is what causes us to learn... and grow. I'm a strong believer in learning from our own experiences, what we've done in the past (including what you did 5 minutes ago) makes us who we are today, good or bad decisions, they all add up to become something... quite indescribable.
And oh, on a somewhat unrelated note, I also did something I'm not sure if I should've done.. but oh well, time will tell.
PS: I feel better now, my fever is gone, finally.
STORY TIME...
This past week and a half I have been back in my home, well, home in Canada, Calgary. Bracing freezing -20 temperatures and leaving my semi-new life behind in beautiful British Columbia to be back here spending the Christmas with my friends and most importantly my parents. Except things didn't really go all that well... The first two days I got back I was still a bit caught up with the cold I managed to get right before leaving Vancouver, but that's okay, I didn't actually have much planned those two days other than relax, rest so I could get better and embark on some adventures with my friends. Unfortunately my days "resting" with the exception of one night didn't really work out as well as I had planned, I went out for drinks/food with some school friends, then stayed up quite late at another friend's house watching them play Majong then proceeded to go home and do some non-productive work (video games, guitar, and talking on the phone) till pretty late... needless to say the rest I was hoping to get didn't exactly happen. The next day I met up with a friend and went to the Oval and did some ice skating... never thought I'd actually do this again willingly, but it's one of those things where I guess I didn't realize how much I enjoyed it till I got the hang of doing it, I had tons of fun and we spent over 3 hours non-stop skating on the biggest rink I've ever been on, in the meantime I had some deep conversations with my friend which was quite invigorating to the mind. Later on that night I had plans to meet up with other friends for dinner, as I was about to leave the house my mom calls me and says.. "wait, don't leave yet".. thinking it was something like.. "can you pickup milk" or something trivial... I waited in the kitchen profusely while constantly checking my phone at the time... then the next thing I hear is.. "uh.. your dad's sick, gotta go to rocky view" (rocky view is a hospital near my house). I'm not really sure how I felt at this point, not gonna lie I was upset because I was already late, but at the same time I was a little worried, so for the next bit my life goal suddenly shifted to get my dad to the hospital as quickly as possible.
the drive to the hospital
While my dad was in the back seat throwing up, I was attempting to speed down the icy roadways of Calgary trying to remember exactly how to get to the hospital the fastest. I don't deal well with someone puking around me, I get sick easily, if I see someone throw up, I will throw up even if I was perfectly healthy... so I had to concentrate my hardest on just driving and tried to ignore everything that was going on behind me. Once we finally got to the hospital I parked asian style and ran in to get a wheel chair, proceeded to help my dad on the wheel chair and pushed him into the ER queue. I left to go meet my friends to which I was an hour late and right before leaving I told my mom to call me as soon as anything happens. Initially at dinner I wasn't sure how I felt, but then I started talking with my friends (about random stuff) and I sorta let what just happened sink to the back of my mind, we ended up staying past till the restaurant closed and was pretty much forced to leave, that was fun, and filling, we had korean bbq and it was really good, minus the smell it left on my jacket.
still waiting for that phone call
It had now been 3 hours since I dropped my mom and dad off at the hospital and I still hadn't heard back, so I attempted to call my mom and it just went straight to voicemail.. I'm like.. ok, well why don't I just go home and wait, in the meantime I'll package up those tires I picked up earlier in the morning to drop them off at Greyhound to ship to Vancouver for my car. So I went home and started doing that, after an hour and a half later I was finally finished, I went back to my room and proceeded to play guitar for an indefinite period of time... I check my phone and it's now 4am... I kept my phone on loud as I proceeded to fall asleep phone in my hand. *RING RING*, 7ish am and I am awoken by a call from my mom, "wow you're awake, you answered so quick, sorry there was no reception here, can you come pick me up, I have an appointment". So I quickly got up and drove again to the hospital to pickup my mom. Once I brought her home I went straight back to bed, except I couldn't sleep well, I was starting to feel... sick. My head was starting to feel quite heavy and my body ached, I chalked it up to wrestling with four 40lb winter tires the night before and didn't think much about it. I woke up shortly after and forced myself out of bed as I needed to bring those packaged tires to Greyhound that day, as I didn't have any time the rest of the days I was here since I was planning on going skiing and hiking the next 2 days. After bringing the tires to greyhound I got home and felt like I was going to die, I was so exhausted and my head must've been on fire at this point I just crashed on my bed, till around 8pm or so when my mom woke me up and said.. "Oh you're here... aren't you suppose to be at your friend's house". Then I realized.. oh crap, yeah... I guess not anymore. Then as I attempted to get up I realized I was not just tired, but I had a fever, not a super high one mind you, but the highest one I can recall having for a number of years, all I could think about was my skip trip tomorrow, what am I going to do. At this point I hadn't taken anything except for vitamin C tablets as I had been the entire time since I was back. My mom made me take a tylenol and I felt a bit better shortly after that, I then proceeded to get extremely pissed off and wrote the blog post you see before this one titled "FTS."
FTS.
I was pretty mad, not really sure at who, it was more at myself for being stupid, at the end of the day I got myself into this situation by not taking care of my health, but at the same time, if my dad didn't get sick I would've been okay, I think... but was I the one who got my dad sick in the first place? Who knows, anyway I stopped thinking about it because ultimately I can't really blame anyone but myself. So I punched my table a few times and just gave up and went back to sleep. The next day I wake up feeling just as bad, and funny thing is the first thing I think of again is the trip to Kananaskis with my friends the next day, I was thinking to myself if I have to cancel this I am going to kill someone. So I spent most of that day trying to force myself back to bed, without much luck I kept waking up feeling like crap and my fever hadn't gone down at all since the first day, my mom kept wanting me to go see a doctor but I hate them so I declined. Finally it was so late I had to decide whether tomorrow was still on or not as we had to pickup rental gear that night if we were still going to go, as much as I wanted to I sadly sent the message that I had to cancel.
-----
So... these are the things I told myself as a result of this past week:
1) Life is unexpected - No matter what you plan for, sh*t happens, and most of the time there's not much you can do about that, you just have to learn to cope and deal with it as it happens..
2) Make the best of what you have - Yeah, none of my plans went well, i got sick, I pretty much didn't leave my house the past few days, but I did manage to play a lot of guitar, and I have now realized playing guitar is another one of those hidden interests which I didn't really realize I had till now. I still suck, but I've never had more fun playing an instrument that causes pain in my fingers.
3) Don't blame others - Sure you could spend all day playing the blame game, but what's the point. Just move on and deal with it.
----
Whether or not those are excuses I gave myself as a result of what happened, or the seemingly poor choices I made that may or may not have resulted in what occurred. I guess we'll never know, but sometimes making a poor choice is what causes us to learn... and grow. I'm a strong believer in learning from our own experiences, what we've done in the past (including what you did 5 minutes ago) makes us who we are today, good or bad decisions, they all add up to become something... quite indescribable.
And oh, on a somewhat unrelated note, I also did something I'm not sure if I should've done.. but oh well, time will tell.
PS: I feel better now, my fever is gone, finally.
Friday, December 28, 2012
FTS.
This post is purely just be complaining because I'm pissed off.
I hate being sick... especially when you actually have a ton of stuff planned. Yeah, I'm sick... again, and this time I'm not happy, well, really when am I ever happy I'm sick, but this one's really pissing me off. I finally make it back to Calgary to see my friends and family and I have planned all these things I'm suppose to do... like right now... I'm sitting in my room sweating and coughing non-stop writing this post, whereas I'm suppose to be at a friend's house eating, playing, and having fun.
Never mind that, but tomorrow I'm suppose to be going to Nakiska to go skiing, something I haven't done ALL SEASON... tomorrow was suppose to be the one day where I get to go out, have fun and enjoy the snow and somewhat warm weather (it's -5 tomorrow instead of -20), rather than doing that, I'm not even sure what I'm going to do, probably sleep and "rest". My mom wants me to go see the doctor but I definitely have no interest in doing that, in fact I'm actually debating if I should just go skiing anyway... she made me take a tylenol 2 hours ago and I'm actually feeling a lot better.. sorta, I'm quite sure it's just the tylenol hiding the symptoms.. but whatever, I can go skiing like this... we'll see, I already cancelled with my friend but I could easily "un-cancel" if that's even a word.
UGHHH I feel like a child right now and I just want to throw a temper tantrum, but I'm not sure at who. ajfkldsjflkadsjflkjsdflkjsdflkjsdflkajlsdfk. I need to go exert my anger somewhere before I break my computer by typing any harder than I already am.... you can't tell but I have been heavily pressing on every letter in this post.
I hate being sick... especially when you actually have a ton of stuff planned. Yeah, I'm sick... again, and this time I'm not happy, well, really when am I ever happy I'm sick, but this one's really pissing me off. I finally make it back to Calgary to see my friends and family and I have planned all these things I'm suppose to do... like right now... I'm sitting in my room sweating and coughing non-stop writing this post, whereas I'm suppose to be at a friend's house eating, playing, and having fun.
Never mind that, but tomorrow I'm suppose to be going to Nakiska to go skiing, something I haven't done ALL SEASON... tomorrow was suppose to be the one day where I get to go out, have fun and enjoy the snow and somewhat warm weather (it's -5 tomorrow instead of -20), rather than doing that, I'm not even sure what I'm going to do, probably sleep and "rest". My mom wants me to go see the doctor but I definitely have no interest in doing that, in fact I'm actually debating if I should just go skiing anyway... she made me take a tylenol 2 hours ago and I'm actually feeling a lot better.. sorta, I'm quite sure it's just the tylenol hiding the symptoms.. but whatever, I can go skiing like this... we'll see, I already cancelled with my friend but I could easily "un-cancel" if that's even a word.
UGHHH I feel like a child right now and I just want to throw a temper tantrum, but I'm not sure at who. ajfkldsjflkadsjflkjsdflkjsdflkjsdflkajlsdfk. I need to go exert my anger somewhere before I break my computer by typing any harder than I already am.... you can't tell but I have been heavily pressing on every letter in this post.
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
My fingers hurt and Phil from Modern Family has my iPhone Case
It's been a while since my last post, mostly because I've been super busy with studying for exams, and when exams were finally over I was catching up on sleep. Random note, my fingers hurt really badly right now and I can barely type on my keyboard. I've been playing guitar for the past 3 hours and in between playing I've been working on my finger muscles with the new finger exerciser I bought at Long and McQuade... I like that store, I wish I knew how to play all the instruments in there because I'd stay there all day and just randomly play instruments, except maybe not because then I'd go there everyday and probably kicked out because I wouldn't have any money to buy anything... although I could work there.... hmmm.
Anyway so after buying the hand finger grip exerciser/strengthener thing me and my friend had nothing to do, so we drove around while looking at drop in rec centres to see if there was anything fun, the only thing we could find was like senior squash and basketball, and I suck at basketball so we decided to go to a park by our school instead and have a snowball fight. Neither of us had gloves so we went to Winners in the mall and bought gloves... yeah... ended up spending too much time in there and bought more than just gloves... oh well. Finally got our gloves and had a snowball fight, except it wasn't real because my friend was oddly very scared of snowballs... don't know why because snowball fights are so fun... so instead we gave up and started building a snowman.
It was freezing and the gloves sucked so my hands were getting wet and starting to get freezing cold, we took a picture of our snowman and just went to go hang out at Tim Hortons... yeah, fun day.
I am definitely going backwards here but last night I was going through the photos on my iPhone while laying in bed as I couldn't fall asleep, and I found this one video that I had recorded of a few people doing the "marshmallow experiment" during one of our study sessions... this was the first time I've ever actually watched the full 6 minutes of what I had recorded, it was pretty funny... and it was quite interesting to see university students complete the experiment, in the same room too. I only did it for 6 minutes, whereas the real experiment goes for 20 minutes... If you have no idea what the marshmallow experiment is watch this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6EjJsPylEOY
It was quite interesting to see how even though we are adults.. or well, at least much older than kids, everyone still pretty much did the same thing the kids did, which is getting really tempted to eat or at the very least play with the marshmallow... The conclusion of the experiment is that people who can wait it out generally are more dependable and overall more successful in life. It basically teaches us patience and that instant gratification (what the world is moving towards) may really not be the best thing for us... most things that happen with practice, patience and time is generally more lasting and much more appealing then things that happen instantly.
I've always been a huge fan of social psychological experiments, they're so fascinating, and the human mind is just.. well, mind blowing haha. Random book suggestion, and in case you didn't know, I hate reading, but this is another one of those books which I found to be extremely interesting.. it's called "Predictably Irrational" by Dan Ariely. Go read it, it's good, if you like that sorta stuff...
And oh yeah... my iPhone case is now officially being used by a "celebrity" haha, Phil from Modern Family in the latest episode has upgraded to an iPhone 5 and is using the exact same Black and Green Belkin case I got for my phone a little over a month ago... so awesome, he's definitely my favorite character on modern family too! Good on you Phil.
I'm leaving in 3 days to go back to Calgary... not really sure how I feel about that, but we'll see I guess... I just can't wait to finally go skiing this season... I hope I'm able to do it since I haven't gone since smashing my face flat on the ground. I will make one more post right before leaving titled, "Bye Vancouver, Hello Calgary".... or I might not, because well, we're all suppose to die in 2 days anyway.
Anyway so after buying the hand finger grip exerciser/strengthener thing me and my friend had nothing to do, so we drove around while looking at drop in rec centres to see if there was anything fun, the only thing we could find was like senior squash and basketball, and I suck at basketball so we decided to go to a park by our school instead and have a snowball fight. Neither of us had gloves so we went to Winners in the mall and bought gloves... yeah... ended up spending too much time in there and bought more than just gloves... oh well. Finally got our gloves and had a snowball fight, except it wasn't real because my friend was oddly very scared of snowballs... don't know why because snowball fights are so fun... so instead we gave up and started building a snowman.
It was freezing and the gloves sucked so my hands were getting wet and starting to get freezing cold, we took a picture of our snowman and just went to go hang out at Tim Hortons... yeah, fun day.
I am definitely going backwards here but last night I was going through the photos on my iPhone while laying in bed as I couldn't fall asleep, and I found this one video that I had recorded of a few people doing the "marshmallow experiment" during one of our study sessions... this was the first time I've ever actually watched the full 6 minutes of what I had recorded, it was pretty funny... and it was quite interesting to see university students complete the experiment, in the same room too. I only did it for 6 minutes, whereas the real experiment goes for 20 minutes... If you have no idea what the marshmallow experiment is watch this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6EjJsPylEOY
It was quite interesting to see how even though we are adults.. or well, at least much older than kids, everyone still pretty much did the same thing the kids did, which is getting really tempted to eat or at the very least play with the marshmallow... The conclusion of the experiment is that people who can wait it out generally are more dependable and overall more successful in life. It basically teaches us patience and that instant gratification (what the world is moving towards) may really not be the best thing for us... most things that happen with practice, patience and time is generally more lasting and much more appealing then things that happen instantly.
I've always been a huge fan of social psychological experiments, they're so fascinating, and the human mind is just.. well, mind blowing haha. Random book suggestion, and in case you didn't know, I hate reading, but this is another one of those books which I found to be extremely interesting.. it's called "Predictably Irrational" by Dan Ariely. Go read it, it's good, if you like that sorta stuff...
And oh yeah... my iPhone case is now officially being used by a "celebrity" haha, Phil from Modern Family in the latest episode has upgraded to an iPhone 5 and is using the exact same Black and Green Belkin case I got for my phone a little over a month ago... so awesome, he's definitely my favorite character on modern family too! Good on you Phil.
I'm leaving in 3 days to go back to Calgary... not really sure how I feel about that, but we'll see I guess... I just can't wait to finally go skiing this season... I hope I'm able to do it since I haven't gone since smashing my face flat on the ground. I will make one more post right before leaving titled, "Bye Vancouver, Hello Calgary".... or I might not, because well, we're all suppose to die in 2 days anyway.
Wednesday, December 5, 2012
LIVE for Today.
Yeah, pretty lame and cliche but I think it's a good life motto. Along with living with no regrets. I have so many life mottos I think I'm going to lose track.
---
That was the most random and weird intro ever. So anyway, it was my birthday yesterday and it was really different, mainly because I've never had a birthday where my parents weren't there. It was good though, I had a lot of fun and what I consider to be some of my closest friends since moving here came over to my apartment and we played board games, ate, all the usual stuff. Two insane things happened though which I definitely did NOT expect. First, these guys all frigging chipped in to buy me a monitor that I had said I wanted to get for a while now, this was like single handedly the best present I've ever gotten. I normally don't care about presents because well, I just don't, but when I opened this thing (which was wrapped with probably a week's worth of Chinese newspapers) which by the way was pretty funny and not gonna lie I had a ton of fun ripping tearing it apart. Anyway, when I opened it I legit had to try soo hard to hold back my emotions, I'm not really sure why, I guess I just didn't expect these people that I've only known for 3 months to do so much. Other than feeling super embarrassed after the fact it was definitely one of those experiences I will remember for the rest of my life. I can't even put into words how grateful I was.
Second, okay I'm really not sure who reads this blog, I really hope nobody does but if you've known me for a number of years, you know that I am like a kid at heart, scratch that, I AM a kid at heart, I usually don't act my age unless I have to. So after opening the present, cutting the cake, all that lame stuff (jk the cake was good) some people had to start leaving, and then as I was getting ready to open the door for them one of my friends say "WAIT there's mango pudding". At this point I was pretty much already acting like a 6 year old because of the things that happened earlier so when I heard that I pretty much flipped out, yeah, mango eff'ing pudding! The last time I had hand made mango pudding? NEVER! I always just get it when I go eat lunch with my parents at Chinese dim sum restaurants only to have the person that hands it to me give me a really dirty look as in (you're clearly not less than 10 years old, why are you ordering this) to which I death glare them and take it (with a bit of force) out of their hands and proceed to start eating it like I'm in heaven. But yeah, that mango pudding was so good, unbelievable. I wish I could make desserts like that, actually I'd rather be able to make desserts than cook regular food because cooking regular food is literally just like following a recipe and that's it, but making dessert that tastes good actually requires some talent/skill. I tried to make mango pudding once, let's just say it failed and we had to throw it away, it was that bad. So yeah, the person that made it, thank yooooooooooou like, seriously. And if someone is reading this and thinking "wth it's just mango pudding" then I'm sorry but you have no idea, it's not "just" mango pudding, it's like my childhood. It's like if someone brought Doraemon to life, I'd probably die instantly from happiness.
---
This is a long post because quite frankly I have nothing better to do right now. I'm watching guitar playing tutorials on YouTube which is kind of a tease because I can't even play right now, why does my roommate have to sleep so early =(
I feel so unproductive today because I was going to study for one of my final exams but I never bothered doing it as I was extremely tired, so after going to a meeting at school in the morning (to which I had absolutely zero motivation to be there, in fact I had negative motivation to be there if that's even possible) I went to purolator to go pick up the stuff I ordered on Black Friday. The projector is garbage so I'm returning it. The printer is so freaking big I just left it in my car, I should probably go get it after I finish writing this post so nobody breaks in to steal it. After picking the stuff up I just went to bed and had a really good 4ish hour nap, I haven't had sleep this week, and definitely haven't had a nap in a really long time, so as crappy as naps make me feel shortly after I take them, I feel a lot more energized right now and hopefully I can sleep at a decent time tonight to do some studying tomorrow.
Last random note, I got an email saying that Jawbone UP 2.0 has finally been released again, so I'm going to try and find that and buy it with the money my parents gave me for my birthday. If you don't know what it is, check this out. It's basically a bracelet that tracks your motion, physical activities and sleeping habits. Then it builds a report and recommendation and stuff to help you determine what you need to do more of. The best part (which is the major reason I want this) is it claims to help you feel more energized by only waking you up at the time that would make you feel most energized. And also it'd be cool to see how much more physical activity I should really be doing. Really, it's like having a personal trainer with you 24 hours a day. Kinda cool.
But yeah, I think I'm going to practice stretching my fingers now for guitar and watch more youtube tutorials.
---
That was the most random and weird intro ever. So anyway, it was my birthday yesterday and it was really different, mainly because I've never had a birthday where my parents weren't there. It was good though, I had a lot of fun and what I consider to be some of my closest friends since moving here came over to my apartment and we played board games, ate, all the usual stuff. Two insane things happened though which I definitely did NOT expect. First, these guys all frigging chipped in to buy me a monitor that I had said I wanted to get for a while now, this was like single handedly the best present I've ever gotten. I normally don't care about presents because well, I just don't, but when I opened this thing (which was wrapped with probably a week's worth of Chinese newspapers) which by the way was pretty funny and not gonna lie I had a ton of fun ripping tearing it apart. Anyway, when I opened it I legit had to try soo hard to hold back my emotions, I'm not really sure why, I guess I just didn't expect these people that I've only known for 3 months to do so much. Other than feeling super embarrassed after the fact it was definitely one of those experiences I will remember for the rest of my life. I can't even put into words how grateful I was.
Second, okay I'm really not sure who reads this blog, I really hope nobody does but if you've known me for a number of years, you know that I am like a kid at heart, scratch that, I AM a kid at heart, I usually don't act my age unless I have to. So after opening the present, cutting the cake, all that lame stuff (jk the cake was good) some people had to start leaving, and then as I was getting ready to open the door for them one of my friends say "WAIT there's mango pudding". At this point I was pretty much already acting like a 6 year old because of the things that happened earlier so when I heard that I pretty much flipped out, yeah, mango eff'ing pudding! The last time I had hand made mango pudding? NEVER! I always just get it when I go eat lunch with my parents at Chinese dim sum restaurants only to have the person that hands it to me give me a really dirty look as in (you're clearly not less than 10 years old, why are you ordering this) to which I death glare them and take it (with a bit of force) out of their hands and proceed to start eating it like I'm in heaven. But yeah, that mango pudding was so good, unbelievable. I wish I could make desserts like that, actually I'd rather be able to make desserts than cook regular food because cooking regular food is literally just like following a recipe and that's it, but making dessert that tastes good actually requires some talent/skill. I tried to make mango pudding once, let's just say it failed and we had to throw it away, it was that bad. So yeah, the person that made it, thank yooooooooooou like, seriously. And if someone is reading this and thinking "wth it's just mango pudding" then I'm sorry but you have no idea, it's not "just" mango pudding, it's like my childhood. It's like if someone brought Doraemon to life, I'd probably die instantly from happiness.
---
This is a long post because quite frankly I have nothing better to do right now. I'm watching guitar playing tutorials on YouTube which is kind of a tease because I can't even play right now, why does my roommate have to sleep so early =(
I feel so unproductive today because I was going to study for one of my final exams but I never bothered doing it as I was extremely tired, so after going to a meeting at school in the morning (to which I had absolutely zero motivation to be there, in fact I had negative motivation to be there if that's even possible) I went to purolator to go pick up the stuff I ordered on Black Friday. The projector is garbage so I'm returning it. The printer is so freaking big I just left it in my car, I should probably go get it after I finish writing this post so nobody breaks in to steal it. After picking the stuff up I just went to bed and had a really good 4ish hour nap, I haven't had sleep this week, and definitely haven't had a nap in a really long time, so as crappy as naps make me feel shortly after I take them, I feel a lot more energized right now and hopefully I can sleep at a decent time tonight to do some studying tomorrow.
Last random note, I got an email saying that Jawbone UP 2.0 has finally been released again, so I'm going to try and find that and buy it with the money my parents gave me for my birthday. If you don't know what it is, check this out. It's basically a bracelet that tracks your motion, physical activities and sleeping habits. Then it builds a report and recommendation and stuff to help you determine what you need to do more of. The best part (which is the major reason I want this) is it claims to help you feel more energized by only waking you up at the time that would make you feel most energized. And also it'd be cool to see how much more physical activity I should really be doing. Really, it's like having a personal trainer with you 24 hours a day. Kinda cool.
But yeah, I think I'm going to practice stretching my fingers now for guitar and watch more youtube tutorials.
Saturday, December 1, 2012
What's my wish for this year?
So it's my birthday in exactly 2 days, for most people they'd probably be super excited and be really stoked to get older. But once you get to a certain age it becomes rather mundane and it becomes quite the opposite, you'd actually rather the day not exist. Every year since my 20 some birthday I've started to think a lot about what I've done or have yet to accomplish, especially the couple days right before my birthday, it's actually kind of depressing haha. But with that said, usually the day of is actually quite good and I seem to forget about all that stuff mainly due to the other distractions that go on throughout that day with friends and family.
Wow, I just re-read what I wrote and that's a very depressing intro... I promise you this post is not going to be a mood killer. I was laying in bed watching YouTube videos and I came across this one video which was a Church that decided to create a worship experience based around the song Beautiful Things by Gungor. It's 11 minutes long but I thought it was quite captivating, I could only imagine what it would've been like to actually be there. Anyway while watching this and listening to the song (which by the way is absolutely one of my favourite worship songs right now) I thought about what should my next steps be in life. This past year already has been quite incredible, as 1 year ago I was in Calgary, living at home, probably sitting in my room or at school working on final projects whereas now, I am sitting in my own apartment in 1000 kilometres away from home trying something completely different with my education career and being thrown into many challenging yet fun, exciting and invigorating experiences.
One of my greatest strengths (imo) has always been that I am can get very passionate about something very easily and quickly, but that is also one of my greatest pitfalls, because I run out of steam rather quickly, and this results in me starting up or exploring possibilities, giving it a try, and then giving up to move onto something else. This becomes a difficulty because I rarely ever get anything done, at least not to the point where I would be really happy with it. Although this probably has to do with my lack of patience and my OCD of perfection. Anyway, I'm not going to get into all the details because it's pretty boring, if you really want to know you can ask me.
What I've decided for this year, this is weird, it's like I'm making a new years resolution for my birthday, but whatever, it's close enough.... so for this coming year, I'm going to attempt to to work on things I've already started/established, rather than starting another 10 new things I will probably never work on until some random number of years later, if ever. I normally wouldn't even attempt such a challenge but this past year I feel like I've gone through so much already that this might actually be a lot easier than I am anticipating.
List of things to work on/finish this year (minimum 5):
Wow, I just re-read what I wrote and that's a very depressing intro... I promise you this post is not going to be a mood killer. I was laying in bed watching YouTube videos and I came across this one video which was a Church that decided to create a worship experience based around the song Beautiful Things by Gungor. It's 11 minutes long but I thought it was quite captivating, I could only imagine what it would've been like to actually be there. Anyway while watching this and listening to the song (which by the way is absolutely one of my favourite worship songs right now) I thought about what should my next steps be in life. This past year already has been quite incredible, as 1 year ago I was in Calgary, living at home, probably sitting in my room or at school working on final projects whereas now, I am sitting in my own apartment in 1000 kilometres away from home trying something completely different with my education career and being thrown into many challenging yet fun, exciting and invigorating experiences.
One of my greatest strengths (imo) has always been that I am can get very passionate about something very easily and quickly, but that is also one of my greatest pitfalls, because I run out of steam rather quickly, and this results in me starting up or exploring possibilities, giving it a try, and then giving up to move onto something else. This becomes a difficulty because I rarely ever get anything done, at least not to the point where I would be really happy with it. Although this probably has to do with my lack of patience and my OCD of perfection. Anyway, I'm not going to get into all the details because it's pretty boring, if you really want to know you can ask me.
What I've decided for this year, this is weird, it's like I'm making a new years resolution for my birthday, but whatever, it's close enough.... so for this coming year, I'm going to attempt to to work on things I've already started/established, rather than starting another 10 new things I will probably never work on until some random number of years later, if ever. I normally wouldn't even attempt such a challenge but this past year I feel like I've gone through so much already that this might actually be a lot easier than I am anticipating.
List of things to work on/finish this year (minimum 5):
- Get back into a regular serving/volunteering position at Church or some other non-profit organization
- Play guitar well enough to help with #1 and for personal enjoyment
- Establish a solid ground/framework for what to do with All Things Mobile and other web projects on limbo
- Continue being active through physical activities at least twice a week (running, hiking, biking, etc)
- [Empty slot to start/learn something new -- Snowboard? Sing? Dance? Don't know yet]
Sunday, November 25, 2012
Just one more week of school
It's currently 2:42 am as I write this blog post so I will probably ramble and some sentences might not make sense. I just had a large Coca Cola so that's why I can't sleep. I haven't drank pop in so long until recently, where I've been getting lazy and cheap as it's stupid that you have to pay extra for water when ordering food that comes with a drink.... ANYWAY, guess I'll have to go running lots after this insanely busy week to make up for it.
So yeah, there's only one more week left of school for this semester and I'm getting a bit nervous, actually scratch that, I'm getting extremely nervous for a few reasons..
1. Lots of stuff is Due!
I don't want to bore you with the details but there's major projects and presentations due this last week and it's like a fight to get it all done. I accomplished a lot this weekend but I feel like I could've done more, I think it's just my obsession for perfection kicking in.
2. Not sure how I feel about next semester...
I am taking 5 classes, 1 is online, but it's still 5 classes, the first semester is not even over yet but I am getting extremely worried about next semester. I will pretty much no longer be with any of my first year friends which when I think about it is going to be kind of sad, and if I really think about it, I'll probably not be in any of their classes in the future either since I AM a transfer student and I am suppose to be going through everything at a much faster pace. EMO Moment Warning: Which totally sucks because I feel like the further I get into this program the less people I'll know since people tend to hang around with people they already know especially after first year... Forever alone!
On top of that I am being forced to take not 1 but 3 math classes, 1 to upgrade my math so I can take another math upgrade class, then finally the actual math class I need for my degree. I suck at math, not sure how I'm going to pass 3 of them. This has resulted in me seriously doubting my decision to move here and attempt SFU, it's already been a lot harder than I had expected so I'm not too sure how much more I can take. So yeah, I have been thinking about moving back to Calgary to finish my Communications degree which requires no math and then take a marketing certificate like my original plan, then once I'm finally done all that move back to Vancouver and attempt to find a job.
3. What does the future hold?
If I don't end up passing those math classes, what am I going to do? I can't finish my degree. So yeah, basically my life is dependent on those math classes right now, yay!
---------
Those lines represent a change of topic. So it was Black Friday, I wanted to buy a new desktop computer to use at home so I don't have to just use my laptop because quite frankly sometimes typing on this thing kinda sucks. I tried looking for decent deals on a desktop and I guess nobody buys them anymore because out of everything and every store on sale there was like 1 desktop, and it sucked, so obviously I didn't end up buying it.
On another note, I bought a new printer which is sweet! NERD ALERT: I'm so excited, I was just randomly browsing and looking for deals when I came across this super awesome color laser printer, then I looked for related printers and suddenly I see a wide format printer by HP. I looked into it more and it prints up to 13x19... and it was only $199 in the States. So I was going to go down to Costco and buy it but then I didn't want to cross the border since it is packed with cars, I decided to look online more and see where I could order it and have it shipped to Canada. Finally found this one site that has it and will actually ship to Canada, they even have it for cheaper at $129, SCORE! Except when I tried adding it to cart it said their online store is closed until 4 hours later, so I decided to spend the next 4 hours waiting and 1 minute before the online store opened again I sat in front of my computer refreshing like crazy... yeah... who does that for a printer, i'm weird. Anyway I'm super excited about my purchase, I can't wait till it gets here, it even uses the same ink as my current printer which is a double bonus. I can't remember when I was ever this excited about a printer... I don't think anyone but me would get so excited about a printer, I have a sad life.
I also went to go buy a Christmas tree.... it was $49, from regular $150, I feel like I got a sweet deal and it actually looks pretty decent, it's pre-lit and yeah, I'm too lazy to decorate it, so whoever wants to come over and help me decorate it.. that would be really awesome. Out of pure randomness I also bought a breadmaker that was on sale for $90. It actually works pretty well, I wonder how many loafs of bread I'm going to have to make to actually make the machine worthwhile.. oh well, I've always wanted a breadmaker anyway, this was a good excuse to buy one..... so i spent $129 + $49 + $90... I don't even have a job, WTF!
Oh yeah, I also randomly bought a projector from some no-name brand that apparently might not even work... sweet. Only reason I bought it... its super cheap, it claims it has great specifications, and there's no reviews. So if it really does work well, I'm going to write a review on it and send it to one of my editors to post it on our tech blog, that should get us a good number of views..... and if it sucks, and is complete garbage, I'll probably write a review too but then I'll send it back for a refund. Speaking of which... he texted me (1 of the editors) saying we got a giveaway item from Samsung and I replied back asking what it was, when he told me it was a camera I was quite disappointed and pretty much didn't care lol, I was really hoping it would be something sweet like a galaxy s3.. #firstworldproblems.
I don't know what else to write... I'm currently listening to Falling to Pieces (She Wolf) by David Guetta feat. Sia. It's actually a really good song, I like David Guetta beats/music and I like it even more when Sia does the vocals, not really sure what the song is about though but the video is super cool and kinda sad at the same time, apparently she wolf means prostitute so yeah.. no clue what's going on there.
Probably going back to Calgary for Christmas, I'm pretty excited for that, finally get to see my friends and parents that I haven't seen for ~4 months now. I wonder if it's just me, but sometimes I can be surrounded by a lot of people but still feel pretty alone, especially here, don't know why. Oh well, it'll be good to catch up with some really good/old friends when I get back. I won't have to spend Christmas alone! woohoo! It is now 3:16 am as I conclude this post.
Good night.
So yeah, there's only one more week left of school for this semester and I'm getting a bit nervous, actually scratch that, I'm getting extremely nervous for a few reasons..
1. Lots of stuff is Due!
I don't want to bore you with the details but there's major projects and presentations due this last week and it's like a fight to get it all done. I accomplished a lot this weekend but I feel like I could've done more, I think it's just my obsession for perfection kicking in.
2. Not sure how I feel about next semester...
I am taking 5 classes, 1 is online, but it's still 5 classes, the first semester is not even over yet but I am getting extremely worried about next semester. I will pretty much no longer be with any of my first year friends which when I think about it is going to be kind of sad, and if I really think about it, I'll probably not be in any of their classes in the future either since I AM a transfer student and I am suppose to be going through everything at a much faster pace. EMO Moment Warning: Which totally sucks because I feel like the further I get into this program the less people I'll know since people tend to hang around with people they already know especially after first year... Forever alone!
On top of that I am being forced to take not 1 but 3 math classes, 1 to upgrade my math so I can take another math upgrade class, then finally the actual math class I need for my degree. I suck at math, not sure how I'm going to pass 3 of them. This has resulted in me seriously doubting my decision to move here and attempt SFU, it's already been a lot harder than I had expected so I'm not too sure how much more I can take. So yeah, I have been thinking about moving back to Calgary to finish my Communications degree which requires no math and then take a marketing certificate like my original plan, then once I'm finally done all that move back to Vancouver and attempt to find a job.
3. What does the future hold?
If I don't end up passing those math classes, what am I going to do? I can't finish my degree. So yeah, basically my life is dependent on those math classes right now, yay!
---------
Those lines represent a change of topic. So it was Black Friday, I wanted to buy a new desktop computer to use at home so I don't have to just use my laptop because quite frankly sometimes typing on this thing kinda sucks. I tried looking for decent deals on a desktop and I guess nobody buys them anymore because out of everything and every store on sale there was like 1 desktop, and it sucked, so obviously I didn't end up buying it.
On another note, I bought a new printer which is sweet! NERD ALERT: I'm so excited, I was just randomly browsing and looking for deals when I came across this super awesome color laser printer, then I looked for related printers and suddenly I see a wide format printer by HP. I looked into it more and it prints up to 13x19... and it was only $199 in the States. So I was going to go down to Costco and buy it but then I didn't want to cross the border since it is packed with cars, I decided to look online more and see where I could order it and have it shipped to Canada. Finally found this one site that has it and will actually ship to Canada, they even have it for cheaper at $129, SCORE! Except when I tried adding it to cart it said their online store is closed until 4 hours later, so I decided to spend the next 4 hours waiting and 1 minute before the online store opened again I sat in front of my computer refreshing like crazy... yeah... who does that for a printer, i'm weird. Anyway I'm super excited about my purchase, I can't wait till it gets here, it even uses the same ink as my current printer which is a double bonus. I can't remember when I was ever this excited about a printer... I don't think anyone but me would get so excited about a printer, I have a sad life.
I also went to go buy a Christmas tree.... it was $49, from regular $150, I feel like I got a sweet deal and it actually looks pretty decent, it's pre-lit and yeah, I'm too lazy to decorate it, so whoever wants to come over and help me decorate it.. that would be really awesome. Out of pure randomness I also bought a breadmaker that was on sale for $90. It actually works pretty well, I wonder how many loafs of bread I'm going to have to make to actually make the machine worthwhile.. oh well, I've always wanted a breadmaker anyway, this was a good excuse to buy one..... so i spent $129 + $49 + $90... I don't even have a job, WTF!
Oh yeah, I also randomly bought a projector from some no-name brand that apparently might not even work... sweet. Only reason I bought it... its super cheap, it claims it has great specifications, and there's no reviews. So if it really does work well, I'm going to write a review on it and send it to one of my editors to post it on our tech blog, that should get us a good number of views..... and if it sucks, and is complete garbage, I'll probably write a review too but then I'll send it back for a refund. Speaking of which... he texted me (1 of the editors) saying we got a giveaway item from Samsung and I replied back asking what it was, when he told me it was a camera I was quite disappointed and pretty much didn't care lol, I was really hoping it would be something sweet like a galaxy s3.. #firstworldproblems.
I don't know what else to write... I'm currently listening to Falling to Pieces (She Wolf) by David Guetta feat. Sia. It's actually a really good song, I like David Guetta beats/music and I like it even more when Sia does the vocals, not really sure what the song is about though but the video is super cool and kinda sad at the same time, apparently she wolf means prostitute so yeah.. no clue what's going on there.
Probably going back to Calgary for Christmas, I'm pretty excited for that, finally get to see my friends and parents that I haven't seen for ~4 months now. I wonder if it's just me, but sometimes I can be surrounded by a lot of people but still feel pretty alone, especially here, don't know why. Oh well, it'll be good to catch up with some really good/old friends when I get back. I won't have to spend Christmas alone! woohoo! It is now 3:16 am as I conclude this post.
Good night.
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